My Favorite Things is a parody of My Favorite Things from Rodgers and Hammerstein’s musical The Sound of Music , dedicated to all the fen who appreciate filk. It has references to these stories:
Her Majesty’s Wizard
The first verse and the hook (refrain) mostly refer to characters in John Ronald Reuel Tolkien’s popular Legendarium , with one reference to Isaac Asimov’s novel The Currents of Space .
Gardening spiders refers to Ungoliant , who took the form of a giant spider and, along with Dark Lord Melkor , Later known as Morgoth Bauglir destroyed the Two Trees of Valinor .
swords that are broken
refers to
Elendil’s
sword
Narsil
,
called The Sword that was Broken
after its damage in a battle
against
Sauron
,
and later carried by
Aragorn
(Strider
).
The Black Speech is a language constructed by Sauron for Mordor .
Unfaithful stewards refers to Denethor , the 26th ruling Steward of Gondor .
An Orc is an evil monster bred by Sauron. A neuronic probe is a fictional device in Isaac Asimov’s novel The Currents of Space .
favorite kings refers to Aragorn, king of Gondor.
Verse refers to characters in The Two Towers , volume 2 of "The Lord of the Rings". Saruman is an istar (wizard) who was the head of the White Council but was tempted by power and allied himself with Sauron. Saruman and Sauron sent orcs to capture the hobbits Meriadoc Brandybuck (Merry) and Pippin Took . The hobbits escaped into Fangorn Forest after a rescue by the Riders of Rohan.
In Fangorn Forrest the hobbits met Treebeard, the oldest of the ents, and told him of their adventures. They convinced the ents to destroy Saruman’s tower of Orthanc. After the battle, the hobbits were reunited with their party and the enraged Grima Wormtongue threw a palantir at Gandalf, not realizing its value.
Verse refers to Harold Shea in
Lyon Sprague de Camp’s
and
Murray Fletcher Pratt’s
fantasy collection
The Incomplete Enchanter
.
In the first story,
The Roaring Trumpet
,
Harold Shea is cast into the world of Norse mythology,
where he and
Heimdall
are captured by
Fire Giants
.
After escaping, Shea brings Heimdall to where the other
Æsir
are gathered so that he may blow his trumpet
Gjallarhorn,
initiating the battle of
Ragnarök
.
In the second story,
The Mathematics of Magic
,
Shea is cast into the world of
Edmund Spenser’s
epic poem
The Faerie Queene
.
There he and
Belphoebe
are accosted by the Blatant Beast, who demands an epic poem
on pain of death. The only poem that the beast hasn't already
heard and that Harold can remember is
The Ballad of Eskimo Nell
,
a bawdy poem that shocks the beast into running away.
Herald, embarassed, does not want to explain the poem to Belphoebe.
Verse refers to characters in three unrelated stories by Anne Inez McCaffrey and James Henry Schmitz .
Peddlers refers to a zone agent of the Confederacy of Vega
in the story
The Second Night of Summer
(Galaxy Science Fiction, December 1950), included in the anthology
Agent of Vega
.
Pretty young ladies Who can speak to dragons refers to Lessa in the novel Dragonflight , the last surviving daughter of a conquered noble family, Searched and trained as any candidate is, who Impresses the newly hatched queen Ramoth at the hatching — a bond compelling from its first instant.
ship who sings refers to the character
Helva in
The Ship Who Sang
,
a girl whose body was severely deformed at birth and who could
never have lived a normal life. Her brain has been wired to the
controls of a spaceship, and she identifies with the ship. Unlike
most of the brains
, she has musical talent strong enough
the make her famous as the ship who sings.
The verses about the Harper Hall trilogy and their explanations have moved to Spoilers for My Favorite Harpers.
Verse refers to stories in Gordon R. Dickson’s Dorsai series . The song about the Rochmont lords hanging Col. Jacques Chretien is mentioned in several different stories.
The march “Su Madre” is mentioned in Gordon R. Dickson’s Hugo Award–winning novella Lost Dorsai (1980), in which a pacifist Dorsai band leader stops a revolt by leading the band to the enemy, playing the insulting march and allowing themselves to be martyred. Su madre is Spanish for “your mother”.
Verse refers to Robert Anson Heinlein’s story ‘—All You Zombies—’ , The Magazine of Fantasy & Science Fiction : March 1959. In verse 4, Time traveling bar men refers to the narrator, who, with the aid of a time machine and a sex change operation, is his own father and own mother. Heinlein is known as the "dean of science fiction writers"; his stories ‘—All You Zombies—’ and By His Bootstraps are the seminal stories of the genre.
Verse refers to
Avram Davidson’s
story
Take Wooden Indians
,
Galaxy: June 1959, subsequently reprinted in
The Fifth Galaxy Reader and Davidson’s own
Strange Seas and Shores, and also included in
The Avram Davidson Treasury.
Nostalgic time traveler refers to Don Benedict, who holds Elwell’s Equation alone after a fatal confrontation with a fellow Wooden Indian Society member who claimed it belonged to all of them, not to Don.
Verse refers to characters in the Lord Darcy stories by Gordon Randall Phillip David Garrett (Randall Garrett) . Lord Darcy is the Chief Forensic Investigator for the Duke of Normandy; Master Sean O'Lochlainn is Lord Darcy’s magical aide.
Verse refers to characters in Poul Anderson’s Trader Team, Analog Science Fact & Fiction : vol. 75, no. 5, July 1965, part of his Polesotechnic League series. Collected in 1966 under the book title The Trouble Twisters (features David Falkayn, not Nicholas van Rijn), alongside “The Three-Cornered Wheel” (1963) and “A Sun Invisible” (1966) -- “Trader Team” was the story's original Analog title.
Over-sized lizards refers to Adzel, a reptilian alien partnered with the human David Falkayn.
Verse refers to characters in
Poul Anderson’s
Operation Changeling
, the final chapter of his
Operation Chaos
.
Witches and warlocks refers to Werewolf Steven Matuchek and his wife Virginia (Ginny
) Graylock.
Whose babies are taken refers to their daughter Valeria, whom agents of the Hell world have replaced with a changeling.
Don't take it lightly refers to Steve and Ginny’s rescue mission.
The Hell World is shaken refers to the havoc that their allies wreak on the Hell world.
, , and refer to characters in Henry Beam Piper’s novel Lord Kalvan of Otherwhen .
Calvin refers to Calvin Morrison , a Keystone cop who is accidentally taken into and stranded in an alternate universe by a paratime transporter : he later learns that the region is called the princedom of Hostigos . The locals later have trouble with his American name and refer to him as Lord Kalvan.
Paratime mystery refers to the existence of alternate universes and of paratime transporters. Prince Ptosphes refers to the prince of Hostigos and lovely young princess refers to Princess Rylla, the daughter of Prince Ptosphes and eventually Kalvan’s wife.
Peasants are fleeing refers to a raid by Nostor , a hostile neighbor of Hostigos; he can yell louder refers to Kalvan’s rallying the fleeing peasants into a counterattack, during which Rylla inadvertently shoots Kalvan and, realizing her error, brings him home to recuperate.
The locals believe that gunpowder can only be made by the priests of Styphon . They thought they were lost refers to an embargo by Styphon’s House against selling gunpowder to Hostigos when it is on the brink of war with Nostor.
Their hopes he’s igniting refers to Kalvan, who has studied military history, the rudiments of military science, including the manufacture of gunpower, rifling and counterespionage. He is attempting to teach things that can be done with existing infrastructure, while laying the groundwork for more advanced technology. Yet he can't keep Rylla his Love from the fighting refers to Rylla’s strength of character; neither Kalvan nor her father can keep her from the front lines for long. Ptostophes has no son, and has raised Rylla as his heir; she is courageous, intelligent, strong and devoted to the welfare of her country.
Being a rival To all the great kings refers to Great King Kaiphranos of Hos-Harphax, , to whom Hostigos nominally owes allegiance.
Verse refers to characters in Christopher Stasheff’s novel Her Majesty’s Wizard .
Untenured scholars refers to English literature Ph.D. student Matthew Mantrell , who is transported by magic into an alternate universe.
Deposed royal ladies refers to Princess Alisande , the daughter of the deposed king.
Summoning dragons refers to Matthew’s attempt to conjure a source of light for his cell; he inadvertently summons the dragon Stegoman instead.
With tears in their wings refers to the maiming that Stegoman’s tribe imposed in order to protect themselves from his erratic behavior.
Verse refers to
Esther Friesner’s
fantasy novel Gnome Man’s Land
.
A
Bean-nighes
("washerwoman"), aka nigheag na h-ath ("little washer of the ford"),
when seen washing bloody clothes in a stream, is a portent of death, as is a
bean sidhes
In the novel a Bean-nighe is seen washing bloody clothes at a laundromat.
The verses about 1632 (the Assiti Shards) and their explanations have moved to Spoilers for My Favorite Shards.
Verse 18 refers to David Weber’s stories A Beautiful Friendship , “The Best Laid Plans” , and The Honor of the Queen , set in the Honorverse .
Treecats are a highly social nonverbal species native to the planet Sphinx in the Manticore binary star system. While telepathic among themselves, they are only able to read human emotions. Due to the native predators on Sphinx, treecats have evolved an impressive ability to defend themselves, and it would be a fatal error to assume due to their gentle nature that they are helpless.
Treecats exposed to humans often form a strong lifelong telempathic bond with them; separation is painful for both partners. This verse references two treecat-bonding stories. The first human ever to bond with a treecat was Stephanie Harrington , in A Beautiful Friendship , the 1998 short story in the anthology More Than Honor (not the 2011 novel-length expansion of the same title). Honor Harrington’s own bond with Nimitz, at age twelve, is told in “The Best Laid Plans” by David Weber, in the anthology Beginnings (2013). The Honor of the Queen, referenced below, shows the two of them years later, already bonded. Humans with treecats refers to the royal House of Winton on Mantcore, which is a protector of the treecats, with several members who have bonded with them, including the reigning Elizabeth Adrienne Samantha Annette Winton (Queen Elizabeth III)
Mess with their two-legs refers to an assassination attempt against Grayson Planetary Protector Benjamin Mayhew IX at a banquet honoring Honor Harrington. Honor and her treecat Nimitz are severely injured while defending Mayhew.
And see what that brings refers to the damage Nimitz inflicted on the assasins.
Verse 19 refers to Honor Harrington and Pavel Young , in David Weber’s Honorverse .
Pavel cornered Honor, alone in the shower refers to Young’s attempted sexual assault on Honor at Saganami Island Naval Academy, when both were cadets.
Though she broke his bones, still she feared the Youngs’ power refers to backstory narrated in The Short Victorious War : Honor, acting in self-defense, beat Young badly, and would later regard herself as having let him off too easily given what he attempted.
The sad consequences, that forbearance brings refers to Honor’s silence — she never files a formal complaint over the assault. Young’s desertion resurfaces at Basilisk Station: as senior officer of the picket, he takes his ship, HMS Warlock, off to Manticore for an unnecessary refit, abandoning Honor as the system’s sole defender and setting her up to take the blame. Years later, in Field of Dishonor , Honor challenges Young to a duel after he hires a professional duelist to kill Paul Tankersley rather than face him himself. Young breaks dueling protocol and fires early, hitting her shoulder while her back is still turned; the neutral referee moves to shoot Young for the violation, but the text is explicit that Honor’s own return fire kills him first — the referee’s shots strike Young only after he is already dead.
Verse 20 refers to characters from From the Highlands in Changer of Worlds .
Audubon dancers refers to members of the Audubon Ballroom , an anti-slavery organization widely banned as terrorists.
Have strange bedfellows refers to Victor Cachat from the People’s Republic of Haven and RMN Captain (inactive) Anton Zilwicki from the Star Kingdom of Manticore, whose nations are at war.
Verses 21 and 22 mostly refer to Shards of Honor by Lois McMaster Bujold, with one reference to Barrayar .
Betan survey ships refers to a ship from the Survey Service of Beta Colony, captained by Cordelia Naismith. Beta Colony has a reputation for pacifism, which some mistake for cowardice. Whose captains are taken refers to the capture of Cordelia by Captain Lord Aral Vorkosigan from Barrayar, near the beginning of Shards of Honor. . During her captivity, Captain Vorkosigan’s armsman Sergeant Konstantine Bothari has extreme mental illness, due to his mistreatment in the military, but is extremely loyal to Captain Vorkosigan. Vorbarran warships that with strife are shaken refers to Political Officer Radnov’s mutiny against Captain Vorkosigan. When Cordelia’s own crew, Lieutenants Stuben and Lai, sneak down to rescue her (against her explicit order to go home), they encounter the fugitive ringleaders Radnov and Darobey hiding in the woods. A Barrayaran patrol has come looking for the pair; Stuben’s crew ambushes and stuns them, then takes their uniforms and shuttle and uses Radnov and Darobey’s countersigns to transport themselves aboard undetected. Once aboard, Radnov and Darobey’s fellow mutineers are freed from the brig and seize engineering, threatening to cut life support. Cordelia slips away from her own rescuers, talks a guard out of his plasma arc, and helps put the mutiny down herself before the ship can be lost. Mess with Cordelia A slit throat she brings refers to an incident where Admiral Vorrutyer has tied Cordelia, a prisoner for the second time, to his bed, tortured her and ordered Sergeant Bothari to rape her. Bothari instead slits Vorrutyer’s throat.
A surprise reception planned by steady Freddy refers to Cordelia Naismith Vorkosigan being awarded a medal by “Steady Freddy,” the President of Beta Colony, for her alleged killing of Admiral Vorrutyer — it was actually Bothari who slit his throat. Furious at the propaganda use being made of it, she flings the medal back at him.
Her toe in his crotch, because she wasn’t ready refers to security guards grabbing Cordelia the instant she flings the medal back; struggling against them, the toe of her jackboot catches the President in the groin with perfect unplanned accuracy.
Underwater breathing refers to Cordelia garroting Dr. Mehta with a belt and holding her head underwater in an aquarium, telling her to “grow gills” and dunking her under again, until she gets the information she needs.
Mehta refers to the psychiatrist who secretly drugged Cordelia during a supposedly voluntary interview — justifying it afterward as ethical since “permission is obtained post facto” — and who later tries to have her involuntarily committed.
In the novel Barrayar , Cordelia, pregnant with Miles Vorkosigan , is exposed to the teratogen Soltoxin during an assassination attempt on her husband Aral, unconnected at the time to Vordarian. The treatment would have killed Miles, so the medical staff transfer him to a uterine replicator.
Verses 23 and 24 refer to Barrayar by Lois McMaster Bujold.
Some time later, in a separate and unrelated power grab, Stealing the son refers to the capture of Miles’s uterine replicator during Count Vidal Vordarian’s coup. Aral refuses to divert the resources needed for a rescue attempt.
A helpless Vor Lady refers to Cordelia, who organizes a forbidden rescue party: armsman Bothari and Ludmilla Droushnakovi (“Drou”), a Betan-trained bodyguard previously assigned to Princess Kareen, now serving Cordelia, break into the Residence with her while Clement Koudelka (“Kou”) — Aral’s own war-wounded aide-de-camp, who walks with a cane — runs a separate diversion.
During the rescue, Vordarian’s consort Princess Kareen — who believes Vordarian had her own son Gregor killed — grabs a guard’s weapon and tries to shoot him herself; she is disarmed and killed by the guard’s reflexive shot, and the chaos lets Bothari sever Vordarian’s wrist and take him captive.
Losing your head is the fate that it brings is what happens to
Vordarian after Cordelia captures him. He refuses to accept that
his cause is lost, Cordelia orders Bothari to execute him, and he
says What? You're a Betan! You can't do—
. Bad guess ;-)
When she starts to go shopping refers to an incident soon
after Cordelia returns home with her rescued son. Security staff
want to see what is in the bag containing Vordarian’s severed head,
after looking they ask how to list it in the security inventory,
and Koudelka says
Put it down as a Winterfair gift for Admiral Vorkosigan. From
his wife.
Aral has ordered that she be taken to him as soon as she returns,
and she joins a sealed meeting. Aral’s father, Count
Piotr Pierre Vorkosigan
,
angrily asks her Good God, woman, where have you been?
,
she holds up the bag, replies Shopping. Want to see what I bought?
,
and spills the head on the table.
Verse 25 refers to a scene from Barrayar .
Cordelia goes shopping in the capital for a swordstick for Aral’s war-wounded aide-de-camp Lieutenant Koudelka (“Kou”), who walks with a cane. The first sample she tries has its blade snap clean off against the wall; the shop clerk fetches a heavier second sample, which holds up. Told it was meant “to help keep you from running Kou completely into the ground,” Koudelka is touched, if startled by its unexpected weight. It’s the same swordstick Cordelia later draws on Vordarian, and the blade Bothari finishes him with — see “Losing your head,” above.
Verse 26 refers to a scene from Labyrinth .
Making Ryoval’s day
is tongue in cheek — with Miles
guiding her, Taura guts his life’s work: years of irreplaceable
genetic samples, destroyed by his own creation turned against him.
Miles shows her the temperature control on Ryoval’s
high-security tissue-sample freezers and has her turn it with a
single finger, ruining the lot. This refers to Miles Vorkosigan’s
escape from House Ryoval on
Jackson’s Whole with Taura, one of Ryoval’s own genetically
engineered creations, in
Labyrinth
.
Not take much pressure is a literal pun as well as a figurative one — ruining years of Ryoval’s genetic research takes no more than the pressure of Taura’s one finger on a temperature dial.
Verse 27 refers to a later, separate scene from the same Labyrinth, included in the collections Borders of Infinity, Miles, Mutants & Microbes and Miles, Mystery and Mayhem.
Vorbarran agents refers to Miles Vorkosigan in his persona as Admiral Naismith, on a covert mission to extract Dr. Hugh Canaba from House Bharaputra’s Laboratories on Jackson’s Whole, with a cover story of weapon shopping from House Fell.
A gene-tailored soldier refers to an 8' tall super
soldier
developed by Dr. Canaba and commissioned by people who
have never seen combat, known only as Nine
and treated as a
laboratory animal. Dr. Canaba insists on retrieving samples of
radical advances in gene engineering, encapsulated and injected
into Nine’s calf. He explains that Nine has been sold to
House Ryoval. Miles infiltrates House Ryoval in an attempt to
extract Nine, but is caught and thrown into a basement with her.
She won't believe that Miles considers her human unless he makes
love to her. Miles, appalled at her treatment, names her Taura,
helps her to sabotage an irreplaceable collection of genetic
samples and
almost succeeds in escaping with her, but they are fetched by
Baron Ryoval,
A rescue float truck refers to Bel Thorne’s mission to ransom Miles, exchanging him for the quaddie Nicol. Miles conveys a cryptic order to fight, and his party is able to subdue the guards and escape in a stolen float truck, which is damaged by enemy fire but gets away with Miles, Nicol and Recruit-trainee Taura unharmed. The Dendarii’s own drop shuttle, undamaged, only arrives afterward to collect everyone.
Verses 28–33 refer to two stories by
Patricia Collins Wrede
,
Mairelon the Magician
and Magician’s Ward
,
republished together twice: as the 1999 Science Fiction Book Club
hardcover
Magic and Malice
, and, the edition actually used to verify these verses, the
2010 Orb Books trade paperback
A Matter of Magic.
Thieves dressed as boys refers to Kim, an adolescent girl who dresses as a boy because she is afraid of being forced into a brothel if her sex is discovered. She is hired to break into the wagon of Mairelon the Magician, who does a magic show, and to look for a silver bowl. She is caught by Mairelon and coopted into assisting him in an investigation.
Kim discovers that Mairelon is actually Richard Merrill, a real magician and member of an aristocratic family. Towards the end of the investigation Merrill realizes that Kim can see magic being used, when she hides behind a table and prevents a magical disaster by interrupting a spell being dangerously miscast. Merrill proposes making her his ward and teaching her magic.
Kim lives with Merrill in his brother Andrew’s house,
along with his paternal aunt Agatha Lowe, who is not a magician.
Mrs. Lowe has strict notions of propriety, and is bent on finding
a suitable
situation for Kim, i.e., marriage to a
respectable
husband; Kim, however, has repeatedly declared
her unwillingness to marry a toff
. Mrs. Lowe constantly
chastise Kim for her lack of decorum and for spending too much
time at her studies,
while Merrill and his mother Lady Elizabeth Wendall defend her.
Students of Magic refers to Kim after Merrill adopts her. Her lessons include texts in multiple languages.
Who their decorum refers to behavior that Merrill does not find objectionable but that Mrs. Lowe, who has no magical talent, finds improper.
Your so-called ward refers to a snub by the socially prominent Mrs. Hardcastle, who pointedly needles Mairelon about Kim’s irregular status at a tea. Mairelon answers with an icy, perfectly correct set-down: since Mrs. Hardcastle has declared she wants nothing to do with his ward, he assures her she needn’t expect an invitation to her own come-out ball — then bows her and Kim out of the room while pointedly including the other ladies present.
Mannering preens refers to Guy Mannering, a rival wizard
whose badly flawed power-sharing spell threatens to burn out
Mairelon’s mind, and the minds of everyone linked to him.
When Kim realizes Mannering cast the spell in English —
letting its power spill in uncontrolled, a danger she’d
already learned firsthand — she calls him a
blithering idiot,
and, when he grabs her arm to stop her
from leaving, drops him with a palm strike to the chin.
Mrs. Lowe jabs with her sunshade refers to Kim’s supposedly prim chaperone, who turns out to be a fully willing accomplice: she jabs the downed Mannering with her sunshade, bars the door, fetches Hunch on command, and rides all the way back beside the bound and gagged wizard, radiating disapproval but never once objecting to what they’ve done.
Rescue their teacher refers to an incident where Merrill is part of a group casting a spell and Kim discovers that he is in danger of insanity as a byproduct of the spell. She trades places with him, risking her life, and averts disaster.
And get wedding rings refers to Merrill’s proposal to Kim after she recovers from her participation in the spell.
Verses 35–43 refer to the Vorkosigan Saga stories by Lois McMaster Bujold .
In the novel
A Civil Campaign
,
If you like Science Fiction and have a sense of humor, this is a must read.
Miles is in love with the recently widowed
Ekaterin Vorsoisson
,
whose husband
Etienne Vorsoisson
died of accidental asphyxiation after bringing Miles out to the
Waste Heat experiment station at night to show him evidence of the
embezzlement scheme run by the Komarran conspirators from whom he
had himself been taking bribes — he was having second
thoughts and trying to retrieve his honor. They unexpectedly found
the conspirators still there, packing up to flee; furious at his
betrayal, the plotters stunned and chained both men to punish him,
taping documentation of his own bribe-taking to his back to be
certain of disgracing him when found, never dreaming Etienne would
be too careless of his own
safety to have checked his breath mask’s reservoir before
going out; it was nearly empty, and Miles could not break the
chains in time. Due to security issues, neither Miles nor Ekaterin
is permitted to divulge the circumstances of Etienne’s
death.
Ekaterin and Nikki are living in the house of her aunt
Dr. Helen Vorthys
and Helen’s husband
Dr. Georg Vorthys
,
an imperial auditor, one of a handful of officials who investigate
in the Emperor’s name with his full authority.
Ekaterin admires Miles, but wants
a year in peace to recover from her disastrous marriage to Etienne
before even thinking of remarriage. Miles, afraid that someone
else will propose before him, hires Ekaterin to design a garden of
native Barrayar plants as a ruse to spend time with her. Miles,
however, foolishly confides in his cousin
Ivan Xav Vorpatril
,
(That idiot Ivan
— Miles’s own verbatim line for
him, from The Warrior’s Apprentice), who decides
to prank Miles.
As a result of Ivan’s interference, Ekaterin is beset by a host of
unwanted suitors, of whom the worst is
Lt. Alexi Vormoncrief
,
who is attempting to discredit Miles.
Bungled Proposals refers to Miles’s panicky proposal after Simon Illyan , the former head of Imperial Security (ImpSec), asks about Miles’s intended proposal to Ekaterin. She is beyond angry at the deceit, even though she might have been receptive to a more honorable approach.
Nikolai Vorsoisson (Nikki) is Ekaterin’s 9-year old son: a compulsive collector of model jumpships who dreams of training as a pilot himself, and who warms to Miles almost instantly, tech-spec for tech-spec. He is also, in the space of a few days, dealt a second blow on top of his father’s death: informed that he has inherited Etienne’s Vorzohn’s Dystrophy. It is a treatable genetic condition and no bar to a pilot’s neurological interface, but Nikki does not yet fully believe that, and for a while it frightens him worse than the bereavement did. When you mess with Nikki refers to a political attack against Miles by the head of the Conservative Party, Count Boriz Vormoncrief , and his nephew Lieutenant Alexi Vormoncrief , including spreading rumors about Ekaterin and Miles, which they are unable to refute without revealing highly classified information.
While Nikki is alone, Alexi badgers him and attempts to get information damaging to Miles, insisting that Miles murdered Etienne. Ekaterin hears the commotion and is outraged, as is Simon Illyan, who reports Alexi to the current head of ImpSec, General Guy Allegre . This is one of the incidents that eventually leads to Emperor Gregor Vorbarra exiling him to Kyril Island , a deadend and unpleasant duty station where he can do no harm.
Nikki is distressed, and Miles asks Emperor Gregor Vorbarra to tell Nikki as much as he can. The emperor swears Nikki to secrecy, explains that there are some things that he cannot be told, tells Nikki that the rumors are false and gives him permission to call if he feels the need to discuss it further.
Gullible inlaws refers to Etienne’s cousin Vassily Vorsoisson , who is Nikki’s legal guardian under Barrayar’s archaic patriarchal laws; Lt. Vormoncrief has panicked him and Ekaterin’s brother Hugo Vorvayne , claiming that Miles murdered Etienne. Hugo and Vassily threaten to take Nikki away unless she stops seeing Miles. She agrees to stop seeing Miles temporarily, but not permanently.
Later, Lt. Vormoncrief convinces them that it is dangerous for
Nikki to be near Miles or even to remain in the capital, and they
attempt to take Nikki away. Cornered, Nikki threatens,
I’ll tell them you’re kidnapping me for ‘moral
purposes’!
— a phrase whose meaning he plainly
doesn’t know, to Vassily’s bafflement. Nikki bolts
upstairs and barricades himself in Professor Vorthys’s study.
Vassily demands a screwdriver to break in; Ekaterin, arms folded,
tells him Find it yourself
(leaving you blundering
nitwit unspoken but understood). In an absolutely hilarious
scene, Ekaterin, who normally controls Nikki’s assertive
streak,
gives him free rein, and Aunt Vorthys, noticing that the bathroom
connects her own bedroom to the study — a second, unguarded
way in that the two men pressing their ears to the door haven’t
thought of — says nothing. Nikki calls Emperor Gregor, and ImpSec brings
the entire party to Vorhartung Castle, where Gregor is presiding
over the Council of Counts that day. The emperor
rebukes
"Your concern is laudable but not necessary.
Your gullibility is less laudable. Correct it, please."
and "Madame Vorsoisson has my full trust, Lieutenant;
I recommend you give her yours."
Vassily for his gullibility.
Meddlesome shavetails refers to Lieutenant Alexi Vormoncrief, who has spread rumors that Miles murdered Etienne and has badgered Nikki in the Vorthys home, outraging Ekaterin and Simon Illyan, the former head of ImpSec. Both chastise Alexi, and Simon files a complaint with Alexi’s superior officer. Due to the political and diplomatic ramifications, Simon’s formal complaint to ImpSec goes up all the way to Gregor.
Responds to his outcry refers to the emperor ordering
everyone involved in trying to take Nikki away brought to
Vorhartung Castle for an inquiry. When he hears of Lieutenant Vormoncrief’s role
in convincing Nikki’s relatives to take him away from
Ekaterin,
Gregor is
angry
Gerard, take a note. This is the third time this month
that the busy Lieutenant Vormoncrief has come to my
negative attention in matters touching political concerns.
Remind Us to find him a post somewhere in the Empire
where he may be less busy.
,
at Lieutenant Vormoncrief’s repeated interference,
provoking Gregor to exile him to
Kyril Island
,
a deadend and unpleasant duty station where he can do no harm.
Nikki is defiant, his spirit not broken refers to Nikki refusing to go with Vassily, dodging his grab, and threatening to tell everyone Vassily is kidnapping him — and that he’s not his father, both true.
Of bathroom to backstairs, no warning is spoken refers to
the bathroom connecting Aunt Vorthys’s room to the study
where Nikki has barricaded himself. Ekaterin decides that if her
aunt is willing to stay silent about the second door, she will
protect Nikki the same way — by giving him a free hand and
letting him make his call to Gregor.
A separate matter, not part of this verse: when Vassily demands a
screwdriver to force the same door — her uncle’s own
study, an Imperial Auditor’s — Ekaterin denies him even
that much help. Find it yourself.
She doesn’t add
you blundering nitwit
aloud, quite, but it seems to be
understood.
A comconsole rings refers to Nikki using the blank,
unmarked code-card Gregor gave him earlier — a direct line
to the Emperor’s own comconsole channel, reserved for
a very few friends and relatives
. Gregor had offered it for
a narrower purpose, someone to talk to about the rumors over his
father’s death, not rescue from a custody fight; Nikki
stretches its intended use, but under the circumstances the
stretch is justified.
The face of the tyrant with sweat shortly glistens refers
to Vassily, hauled before the Emperor in a private side chamber at
Vorhartung Castle and rebuked: Your concern is laudable but not
necessary. Your gullibility is less laudable. Correct it,
please,
followed by Madame Vorsoisson has my full trust,
Lieutenant; I recommend you give her yours.
Sweet Nemesis refers to Alexi Vormoncrief getting the same dressing-down in the same audience that sends him to Kyril Island — see “Responds to his outcry,” above.
Blackmailing Miles refers to a threat by Richars Vorrutyer
to formally charge Miles with the murder of Etienne Vorsoisson
unless he votes his father’s proxy in his favor. Anybody who knew
Miles well would have warned Richars that Miles did not respond
well to threats. Pretending to agree to do as Richars demanded,
Miles starts assembling allies to ensure that Richars will lose
the vote — Beware the fury of a patient man
(Dryden, Absalom and Achitophel).
trial refers to the trial of Richars Vorrutyer for plotting the castration of his cousin and rival Dono (née Donna).
Ekaterin’s retort refers to Ekaterin
cross-examining Richars over his accusation that Miles murdered
Etienne: mid-argument she pauses to
propose
marriage to Miles on the spot, then resumes and finishes off
Richars’s case, capping it off with a single word aimed
squarely at him: “twit.”
You are mistaken, Lord Richars,
she snapped down at him.
Not your first mistake, apparently.
...
That’s your idea of proof?
Ekaterin snarled.
Fine. Your legal theory is easily demolished–.
...
Let’s finish this. Lord Vorkosigan!
Miles jerked in his seat, taken by surprise. Madame?
He made a little half-bow gesture. Yours to command...
Good. Will you marry me?
...
So much for that line of reasoning, Lord Richars,
Ekaterin finished. She sat back, and added, by no means under
her breath, Twit.
Verses 44–53 refer to the novel Tinker by Wen Spencer
Tinker
refers to the title character of Tinker
, a genius
who runs a junkyard in Pittsburg, which has been moved by a
Chinese orbital gate into the alternate world of Elfhome.
Windwolf refers to Wolf Who Rules Wind, the viceroy of the westernlands, the equivalent of North America in our world. Tinker saves his life twice, but the elf Tooloo has convinced Tinker that she owes a life debt to Windwolf.
A very large magnet refers to a crane in Tinker’s junkyard with an electromagnet, which Tinker uses to disrupt the magically enlarged foo dogs attacking Windwolf, which she initially confuses with wargs.
Oni refers to the exiled Skin clan and their creations.
Crashing the border refers to Oilcan and Tinker fleeing Oni posing as agents of the Earth Interdimensional Agency (EIA). They drive through an EIA checkpoint at startup while trying to get medical care for the badly injured Windwolf.
Soon bring things to order refers to the elves’
intervention when EIA agents arrest Tinker and Oilcan for crashing
the checkpoint at startup.
What’s he saying?
...
He’s saying
‘Hands off the kids or we’ll break your face.’
Duo refers to Tinker and Windwolf. Although Tinker has only asked the elves to treat Windwold, he notices that the hand injured while defending him is infected, and orders the elves to care for her as well.
It’s not you who owe me refers to the lie that the elf Tooloo told Tinker, claiming that Tinker owes a life debt to Windwolf.
Maynard refers to Derek Maynard, director of the Earth Interdimensional Agency (EIA)
Averting a crisis refers to warning Tinker that if the Elves believe that the EIA attempted to murder Windwolf, they would launch a genocidal war.
Tinker telling Maynard refers to Maynard drafting Tinker to identify a collection of contraband items.
bonus refers to items that Maynard allows Tinker to take as compensation for her assistance.
A mark on her forehead refers to a blue triangle, called a dau, that Windwolf places on Tinker’s forehead after she accepts two ceremonial gifts from him, which he mistakenly assumes that she recognizes as betrothal gifts. The dau signifies that she is adopted into the Domana caste, betrothed to him and under his personal protection.
Tinker ze domi is how elves of the Wind clan address Tinker after Windwolf marks her forehead with the dau, recognizing her as a member of his Domana caste.
A misunderstood spell refers to a spell that Windwolf casts
on Tinker. Tinker misunderstands We are at a branching.
...
To the left, every path leads to death. No matter which way you
go, you will die.
as referring to a disease, but it actually
refers to being human and hence mortal. The spell is intended to
make her an elf of Windwolf’s Domana caste.
Offering service refers to Pony, a sekasha nearing his majority, offering his oath of service to Tinker instead of to Windwolf, who had expected it for himself. Windwolf tells her plainly that this brings her honor, since not everyone can hold a sekasha; once accepted, the bond cannot be unmade. Tinker, true to form, says yes before she understands what she has agreed to.
Nathan unconcerned that Tinker is younger refers to Nathan deciding, after Windwolf’s spell remade Tinker as an elf, that the transformation erased the years that had stopped him before. He loses control and gives in to his hunger for her; Pony’s sharp sword at his neck stops the assault before it goes further.
Verse 54 steps outside any single story to close the song.
Strong women knowing their worth and their measure refers to several of the women this song has sung of: Gretchen Richter, Rebecca Abrabanel, Julie Sims, Sharon Nichols, Cordelia Vorkosigan, Ekaterin Vorsoisson, Honor and Stephanie Harrington, Lessa, Tinker, Princess Rylla, and Kim. A rifle, a dragon refers to Julie Sims’ scoped Remington and Lessa Impressing the newly hatched queen Ramoth — a sudden, lifelong bond, the same shape as the treecat bonding described above. a hard-won treasure refers to the silver Balthazar Abrabanel was carrying: a chest of guilders belonging to Gustav Adolf, entrusted to him for delivery. Alexander Mackay, Gustav’s own captain, had been sent to collect it; Mike’s rescue is what kept it out of Tilly’s hands. Read Tehillim, recognition it brings refers to reading Tehillim (“praises”), the Hebrew name for the Book of Psalms, and recognizing these same women in it.
Verse 55 is the song’s closing tribute.
A woman of valor translates esheth chayil , Proverbs 31:10–31 , traditionally sung in praise of a woman’s strength and worth — a closing nod to several of the women this song has sung of, not a claim that each one fits the Proverbs 31 mold specifically: among them Gretchen Richter, Rebecca Abrabanel, Julie Sims, Sharon Nichols, Cordelia Vorkosigan, Ekaterin Vorsoisson, Honor and Stephanie Harrington, Lessa, Tinker, Princess Rylla, and Kim. Her hands to the needy echoes Proverbs 31:20 , “she stretcheth out her hand to the poor,” direct enough to double as one more nod to Gretchen founding the Committees of Correspondence among Jena’s poorest women.